9/26/2022

THE CHURCH OF JESUS CHRIST OF LATTER-DAY SAINTS
TO CHURCH LEADERS IT MAY CONCERN
47 EAST SOUTH TEMPLE STREET
SALT LAKE CITY, UTAH 84150

To Church Leaders It May Concern,

I was excommunicated from the church 15 years ago, after 40 years of activity in the church, so I’ve had plenty of time to think about my experience with church. I know the church. And, I know why my way of thinking isn’t in harmony with the church’s way of thinking.

The church teaches, that a prophet can’t lead the church astray, but I believe the church has been led astray, as members are led, more to “obtain” blessings for themselves, than to love and bless others.

The entire church program is based on “worthiness” to “obtain” blessings. The “goodness” of members is measured, according to a set of standards revealed to the prophet, and members are led to expect “blessings,” according to their level of compliance.

The entire church program is based on the idea, that “all blessings” are obtained by obedience to the laws/standards they’re predicated upon, that whenever we enjoy any blessing from God, it’s only because of our obedience to the law/standard that it’s based on.

The entire church disciplinary system is also based on this idea. Blessings are removed from members when they’re judged disobedient to the church’s standard, where excommunication, the church’s maximum disciplinary measure, is the removal of all church blessings.

And, it’s the hope of church leadership, that after disciplinary measures are put in place, the judged will want to regain those blessings, by becoming “good/worthy” again, through obedience to the standard.

But, isn’t there a huge problem with this way of thinking? Isn’t the church training members to always think in terms of “getting” blessed, about “what’s in it for them,” which is the opposite of what God wants, who wants us to always think about “blessing” others, or about “what’s in it for others?”

In essence, church members appear to be selfless, through abiding by the revealed standard, but aren’t their motives actually selfish, being rooted in a desire to “get” blessed? Isn’t this an example of what wolves in sheep’s clothing would do?

There are two types of Kingdoms of God in the world.

On the one hand, as explained in the New Testament, there’s the Kingdom of God that’s within people, where through embracing conscience and the Holy Ghost, the laws of God are written on their hearts, where they feel, only to love and bless others, without seeking blessings for themselves.

On the other hand, there are kingdoms of God, like the LDS church, that seek to establish goodness, by a leader deciding for everyone, what’s good and bad, and where members are promised blessings for their compliance.

And, it’s because I belong to the kingdom of God that’s within people, that I was judged “unworthy” of all church blessings, for I questioned the divine validity of a church position, which indicated to those judging me, that I wasn’t allowing the prophet’s directives to be the standard for my life.

Rather, I was allowing conscience and the Holy Ghost to reveal the Lord’s standard for my life.

As I read the Bible, I’m taught that there’s an “old covenant,” where a prophet revealed the standard, and there’s a “new covenant,” which is different, where the laws of God are to be written directly on people’s hearts.

The LDS church appears to be establishing the “old covenant.”

I’m experiencing the “new covenant.”

While in the church, I believed in the charge given at baptism, to “receive the Holy Ghost,” which led me to love and bless others. But, when I was judged and excommunicated, church leaders condemned the idea of being led by the Spirit, wanting me instead, to obey the dictates of a prophet, in order to “get” blessed.

While in the church, I thought of the church as a restoration of Christ’s “new covenant” church, not of the letter of the law that kills, but of the Spirit that gives life, as Paul taught.

Now, I understand the LDS church to be a restored “old covenant” church, where laws of God are written in stone, by a prophet, rather than they being written on the hearts of members, as they embrace conscience and the Holy Ghost.

I don’t consider myself “worthy” or “good,” but instead, I believe God is good, who guides and directs my path, who fills my heart with love and a desire to bless others. So, the LDS idea of obedience, in order to “get” blessed, is far from my thoughts.

It makes sense to me, why Jesus, who I believe had the kingdom of God within him, replied to the man who called him “good” master, by asking him a question, “why do you call me good, there are none good, but God?”

Jesus didn’t consider Himself good, because to the degree we consider ourselves “worthy” or “good,” to that same degree we’ll selfishly think we deserve to “get” greater and greater blessings, until our pride swallows up any desire we ever had to love and bless others.

And, this is why I believe the LDS church has been led astray, because its focus on “worthiness,” based on obedience, in order to deserve to “get” greater and greater blessings, ends up filling its members with more and more pride, until all they think about is “getting” blessed, which is to deny the Holy Ghost, which is to deny the voice that only inspires us to love and bless others.

When I was excommunicated, I was told that all church blessings were taken from me. But, that didn’t bother me, because I was so wrapped up in experiencing the Holy Ghost, that I only thought of loving and blessing others.

And, to this day, I have no desire to return to the church, because my life is bliss, filled with peace and joy, where I just feel so much love for others, wanting them to be blessed, rather than thinking about blessings for myself.

If I were to lead the LDS church, I would promote a path of loving and seeking to bless others.

As for baptism, I would require a candidate to show that they believe in “win win” thinking, where they love their neighbor as them self, which conscience enables us all to do, which is the beginning of the kingdom of God dwelling within us.

Under the “old covenant,” at the time of Moses, when the gift of the Holy Ghost wasn’t operating, the commandment to love neighbor as self was active, which means conscience, given at birth, enabled people to abide by this command.

Under the “new covenant,” there was a new commandment to love others as Jesus loved, which went beyond loving neighbor as self, to loving neighbor above self, or in other words, to love, even our enemies.

This level of love requires the Holy Ghost, which is all about feeling love for others, without needing them to love us back, or in other words, to seek more for a “win” for others, and less of a “win” for ourselves.

This, I believe, is the way Jesus loved.

And, I believe those who can engage in at least “win win” thinking, having embraced conscience, are then ready to be baptized, that they may receive the Holy Ghost, which will lead them to love, even unconditionally, like Christ does.

Also, I would lead the church to only excommunicate members, if they engage in extreme “win lose” behavior, where it’s apparent they’ve rejected prompting from both conscience and the Holy Ghost, with encouragement to work on “win win” thinking, in preparation to return.

This way of thinking about baptism and excommunication, would promote becoming more loving and thinking about blessing others, as opposed to the LDS church’s current way, which only leads to the more selfish wanting of “blessings.”

I’m reminded of a visit that I had with my stake president, after being excommunicated from the church. Certainly, his happiness wasn’t based on blessing others, but instead, it was based on “getting” blessed, because when I told him that I was so very happy, he replied, “how can you be happy, when all church blessings have been taken from you?”

Anyway, those are my thoughts.

Please let me know if you have any questions.

With love,

Aaron McMillan

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